Not A Clue

I really like the idea behind this. Its unique and leaves your reader on an edge, so they are always questioning... which I think is a good thing...
However...
What is actually there besides the blanks needs to be more meaningful.
You do a good job of explaining what you feel, but now do it with more images, metaphors and the like... make us feel it as well. We understand perfectly how it is for you, but we need to experience it ourselves, through your writing.

I rather enjoyed your poem. I've never seen this before but it's really creative to me. I love the fact that we can fill in the blank with whatever we want! I think writing is all about having fun. So I think this is really cool.

Oh dear! This looks like a madlib! XD See?

1. Noun

2. Name

3. Noun

4. Noun.

5. Adjective.

6. Noun.

7. Noun.

8. Famous celebrity.

9. Location.

10. Impressive-sounding title.

11. Name.

12. Noun.

It's kind of hilarious like a mad lib too! I had a bunch of people fill it out. Their answers were this:

#1
[spoiler]How to describe you at all
You are a glove

I don’t know
Why I’m such a masochist
To feel for Katrina

I don’t know
What pretentious love song fits
Our biased chocolate.

I don’t know
Where in my life I could fall
Face-first in NOUN

I don’t know
When I fell in this sweet hole
My world gone naked.

I don’t know
How I could feel so damned lost
I must be piano

I don’t know
Why I try so selfishly
To get my Snickers bar

I don’t know
What will make me cry again
Maybe it’s Abraham Lincoln

I don’t know
Where my emotions are placed
Must be in Canada

I don’t know
When I became the same as
You, the great prince of the tigers.

I don’t know
How you gained total control
You, my heart Karina

I don’t know
Why I’m writing this nonsense
It’s not my quail

I don’t care
About what can be described
Just what can’t[/spoiler]

#2
[spoiler]How to describe you at all
You are a stethoscope

I don’t know
Why I’m such a masochist
To feel for Eulalia

I don’t know
What pretentious love song fits
Our biased flashdrive

I don’t know
Where in my life I could fall
Face-first in mango

I don’t know
When I fell in this sweet hole
My world gone fluffy

I don’t know
How I could feel so damned lost
I must be porcelain

I don’t know
Why I try so selfishly
To get my holly

I don’t know
What will make me cry again
Maybe it’s Donald Sutherland

I don’t know
Where my emotions are placed
Must be in Bora Bora

I don’t know
When I became the same as
You, the great Granfalloon

I don’t know
How you gained total control
You, my heart Fiberto

I don’t know
Why I’m writing this nonsense
It’s not my thumbtack

I don’t care
About what can be described
Just what can’t[/spoiler]

#3
[spoiler]How to describe you at all
You are an orange

I don’t know
Why I’m such a masochist
To feel for Jeff

I don’t know
What pretentious love song fits
Our biased piano

I don’t know
Where in my life I could fall
Face-first in chair

I don’t know
When I fell in this sweet hole
My world gone enormous

I don’t know
How I could feel so damned lost
I must be carpet

I don’t know
Why I try so selfishly
To get my computer

I don’t know
What will make me cry again
Maybe it’s Ellen Page

I don’t know
Where my emotions are placed
Must be in Busch Stadium

I don’t know
When I became the same as
You, the great Program Director

I don’t know
How you gained total control
You, my heart Alice

I don’t know
Why I’m writing this nonsense
It’s not my door

I don’t care
About what can be described
Just what can’t[/spoiler]

#4
[spoiler]How to describe you at all
You are snow

I don’t know
Why I’m such a masochist
To feel for Rose

I don’t know
What pretentious love song fits
Our biased rose

I don’t know
Where in my life I could fall
Face-first in cards.

I don’t know
When I fell in this sweet hole
My world gone pink

I don’t know
How I could feel so damned lost
I must be flower

I don’t know
Why I try so selfishly
To get my cartoon

I don’t know
What will make me cry again
Maybe it’s Josh Groban

I don’t know
Where my emotions are placed
Must be in Canada

I don’t know
When I became the same as
You, the great Lord of people

I don’t know
How you gained total control
You, my heart Keegan

I don’t know
Why I’m writing this nonsense
It’s not my wolf

I don’t care
About what can be described
Just what can’t[/spoiler]

#5
[spoiler]How to describe you at all
You are a house

I don’t know
Why I’m such a masochist
To feel for Serena

I don’t know
What pretentious love song fits
Our biased bird

I don’t know
Where in my life I could fall
Face-first in forks

I don’t know
When I fell in this sweet hole
My world gone large

I don’t know
How I could feel so damned lost
I must be simpson

I don’t know
Why I try so selfishly
To get my rose

I don’t know
What will make me cry again
Maybe it’s Michael Jackson

I don’t know
Where my emotions are placed
Must be in New York City

I don’t know
When I became the same as
You, the great Twilight

I don’t know
How you gained total control
You, my heart Lillian

I don’t know
Why I’m writing this nonsense
It’s not my bear

I don’t care
About what can be described
Just what can’t[/spoiler]

I realize that you want to create a sense of ambiguity, and that's awesome. But instead of leaving words out, which, as you can probably see, can be a source of endless entertainment, put awesome words in that really do describe the way you're feeling. That way, your poetry can stand solid and people will view it in a highly serious manner.

Good luck!

Kyte wrote:So, that's a 3-7-3 poem? I think it's like a haiku, but longer.

Ok, the critique. First, the blank at the end of each line is confusing. Is it blanking out a swear word? That isn't likely. Are you supposed to read the next stanza and fill in the blank?

So, that's a 3-7-3 poem? I think it's like a haiku, but longer.

Ok, the critique. First, the blank at the end of each line is confusing. Is it blanking out a swear word? That isn't likely. Are you supposed to read the next stanza and fill in the blank?